I was reading my favorite part of the newspaper today (besides the Front Page and Entertainment Page) and I read this column about college kids visiting their parents’ home for the holidays.  I found the article fair to both parties involved; however, it was slightly biased to the parental perspective (only because the writer is a mother of college kids).  So it made me think . . . Why are parents/senior adults more aware of the plight of college students and young professionals in the post-recession of 2009?

On the surface, late-teens and 20-somethings are living their best lives in the 21st century.  They are enrolled at universities, pursuing a degree, or they are in the job market, working as minions in hopes of becoming the CEO one day.  They are the technology generation, embracing the social networking sites, multi-purpose cellular phones and mobile music players for their day-to-day lives.  They made history by pulling the technological resources together to elect the first African-American (and tech-savvy) President of the United States.  Life should be great, right?

But unfortunately, then came the horrible recession.  As you know from my previous posts, I experienced this recession first hand in Connecticut when I tried my hand at college teaching full-time (which really meant two Adjunct Professor jobs).  After University #1 didn’t rehire me for the following semester, I lost a paycheck, a vital paycheck that kept my world turning as an independent but single woman living in her own apartment. 

So I picked up another job as  a Customer Service Representative as a popular fruit bouquet company.  My basic job description was to take orders over the telephone from customers all over the world.  While I found some small comfort in assisting people in celebrating family members’ milestones like birthdays, Christmas holidays, condolences, welcoming adult children back home from deployment in the Middle East, and many more.  But the day-to-day grind of administrative micromanaging got the better of me.  I learned that I couldn’t talk about my other teaching job in front of my supervisors.  They resented me for it.

Then the axe fell.  I lost my job there too.  I couldn’t pay my bills fully and often times, I was too familiar with darkness in my apartment for a few days.  I felt like a failure.  No matter how many interviews and resumes that I put out, I got nothing back.  Could you imagine telling my parents about my misfortune, especially after all they had sacrificed for me? I could not bear it in the least so I never called them.  

I stopped answering my landline and mobile phones. The only means of communication I was using was the Internet on my laptop to put out more resumes.  But my parents wouldn’t let me go. 

After months of evasion, Memorial Weekend came as I was preparing to still celebrate my birthday with my church friends.  That morning, I got a knock at my door and it was my mother.  It turned out that my parents used the holiday to rent a truck and drive up to my apartment to move me out. 

I wish I could say I was initially grateful that they loved me so much to help me in such a dramatic and grandiose manner.  I was mortified because I knew that my independent life was being assassinated at that very moment.  I would be under the thumb of my parents like I have been when I was in high, middle and elementary schools which I resented so much.

The summer back in my parents’ home was equally painful because even though I was collecting unemployment checks, I was ungainly unemployed which made me feel even worse every day.

I say this to say that although I have only lived for about 20-something years, I have gone through such a great deal of turmoil and heartache as a result of following my passions.  I am also sure that there are thousands upon thousands of other late teen to 20-somethings out there who can empathize with that as well. 

But it is so strange that this perspective has been left out so much in modern conversations.  I would think that the recession has only heightened this awareness but unfortunately, not so much.  We see news segments on the effect of the recession on families with children and 30-somethings having to return to their parents’ households because they lost their homes. 

 Well, I guess there is an overlap with the 30-somethings, but I feel like the “college kids” and 20-somethings need their own category.  As young people finish college and enter the world of career-soul searching, they are the brightest and most vulnerable.

They are the sharpest of the university pencil box, ready to take on the world.  But in the process, employers harness their abilities by making them work harder at meaningless, meager tasks to get the all important paycheck at entry-level.  It is so easy for these pencils to become crusted on the heel of the job market, Manolo stiletto because they fail to “play the game” and as a result, they become discouraged.  Why do these sharp pencils have to dull themselves to make a name for themselves or prove their employers that they belong?

So I come back to the concept of an adult child returning to their parents’ home during the holidays.  It’s almost as if you are packing a lifelong wardrobe in a carry-on suitcase.  It’s not going to fit not matter how much you fold and stuff!!  But I urge you, my fellow “college kids” and young professionals fighting over bathroom time with siblings and senior family members that you compromise a little more than usual.  Having a glass of spiked eggnog while doing so will make it a lot easier (trust me). Your parents will want to be in control even if it is only for the weekend  so oblige them.  They need it more than you do.  Just make sure you get out of the house at least once a day/night.  Trust me, it’s a sanity preserver!

Until next time . . .